I feel like my heart has fallen out of my chest and is lying on the floor, and I’m standing here just staring at it, and am kind of grossed out by the whole situation.. but can’t do anything except stare.

The ideas that “if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself” and “if you don’t do it, nobody will” are absolutely true for me at work, but not when it comes to trusting God in relationships and life situations. Very difficult for me to separate those two different areas.

I have decided that love turns neuroses into cute quirks and makes mundane tasks exciting. For now, everyone’s still crazy and I still hate doing the dishes, but maybe someday that will no longer be the case.

Really, what I want is just to have a person who will sit beside me and I can show them a beautifully written poem or a song and they will be quiet and listen, and really listen, and then when I ask them, “Do you see it? In your mind? Do you know what I mean?”, they will see and understand, and love things the way I love them. It could be someone’s mother or a homeless man on the street, it really doesn’t matter. I just want to know that another person exists, that is like me.